


the road gets tough (i don't know why)

by icanhinatashouyoutheworld



Series: song fics YESSS bOIIIIII [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Fluff, M/M, Pining, Swearing, big bro kyoutani, mother iwa-chan, protective Iwaizumi ftw??????
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-04
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-14 15:04:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9187598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icanhinatashouyoutheworld/pseuds/icanhinatashouyoutheworld
Summary: "Let's break up," Tobio says clearly, and his words are obviously practised, rehearsed. Enter new girlfriend, stage left. Exit Hinata Shouyou, stage right. A momentary silence as the curtains go down.





	1. choose your last words, this is the last time

**Author's Note:**

> "ash why are u like this?" I say as I write yet another crappy piece of fanfic even though I have finished exactly none of my other ones
> 
> BUT THIS WILL BE SHORT I WILL FINISH IT RLLY FAST IM SORRY
> 
>  
> 
> anyway I felt ANGSTY so here is some angst

"I'm sorry," Tobio says, those blue eyes he loves so much fixed on the wall behind Shouyou's head.

"What do you mean?" Shouyou whispers. They're in the front room of their crappy apartment. The shower was dodgy and the kitchen window didn't close and there was barely enough room for their double bed in the bedroom. But it was _their_ crappy apartment, and _their_ nationals medals hung together in the front room, along with a framed picture of _their_ old team and a new one of _their_ university volleyball squad. There is a new addition, an uninvited guest, behind Tobio, on their carpet that is supposed to be white but has turned a dirty shade of cream. A cool blue suitcase sits next to the door. Shouyou realises what is coming, doesn't even have time to brace himself.

"Let's break up," Tobio says clearly, and his words are obviously practised, rehearsed. Enter new girlfriend, stage left. Exit Hinata Shouyou, stage right. A momentary silence as the curtains go down.

When Shouyou was seven years old, he broke his arm falling from a ladder. There was a crack of bone and then burning pain curled along his arm, nausea twisted in his belly and his body was so hot, so so hot.

The thing is, Shouyou knew that he was probably going to fall when he climbed the ladder.

That didn't make it hurt any less when he hit the ground.

This, Shouyou thinks, is remarkably like that. There is no crack of bone heralding the pain's arrival, but it sure as hell is there.

"Is there someone else?" Shouyou finally chokes out. He tastes salt on his tongue, feels tears stinging the cut on his lip the Tobio had left the night before. He half-knows the answer in the back of his head, because part of him suspected it. He'd muzzled the voice that said "are you sure he has a group project?" and shoved it deep down inside. Because Shouyou trusted Kageyama, trusted him on court and off it, mind and soul, body and blood.

Tobio's refusal to make eye contact is all the answer Shouyou needs.

"How long?" Shouyou rasps. Tobio is still silent, and it makes Shouyou _burn_ , pain bearing anger. "How fucking long, Tobio?"

"Six months," Tobio growls back, then apparently remembers that he's meant to vaguely nice while breaking up with the man he's spent four years loving, who'd been by his side for six, because he suddenly clamps his mouth into a firm line. "I'm sorry," he mutters again, for lack of anything else to say.

"Sorry? Sorry?!" he lets out a horrible, thick laugh "I love you, you bastard!" Shouyou shouts, sobs. He's heady, breathless, he feels like he's being pulled through the ground, he feels like someone's dragging him through a storm. "Please don't do this," he whispers plaintively.

Tobio doesn't reply, just stands and looks at anything but Shouyou.

"Get out," Shouyou chokes "ju-just go." Shouyou turns around shakily and looks, blurry-eyed, at a framed photo of himself clinging to Tobio's back when they finally won nationals, like he's getting an injection, like it won't hurt if he doesn't look. Even through the haze in his vision, Shouyou can see the grin splitting his own face and Tobio's proper smile, gorgeous and radiant and so, so happy. They'd made out giddily the whole night at the victory party Shouyou had thrown, bouncing their joy back and forth until he had felt higher than he'd ever been.

When Shouyou turns around, Tobio has gone.

Shouyou flings the picture with all his might at the closed door, and cries harder when it smashes.

 


	2. oh, my heart it breaks (every step that I take)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so tired xxx  
> pls accept this xxx  
> thanks so much to everyone woh comments, bookmarks and kudos y'all keep me going xxx  
> I hope u enjoy!!!!!!
> 
> edit: 9.1.17- fixed a couple of grammar errors :D

 

Hitoka-chan!! ＼（＾０＾）ノ<3 (14 missed calls)

 

Hitoka-chan!! ＼（＾０＾）ノ  <3: Hinata-kun, I heard what happened!! Please answer my calls!

 

Hitoka-chan!!  ＼（＾０＾）ノ<3 (10 missed calls)

 

Hitoka-chan!! ＼（＾０＾）ノ <3: Hinata-kun, please don’t shut yourself away!! 

 

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: Hey, idiot. 

 

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: Are you okay?

 

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P (7 missed calls)

 

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: Pick up the damn phone!

 

Noya-san, the human thunderbolt!!!!: SHOUYOU

 

Noya-san, the human thunderbolt!!!!: SHOUYOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Kenma  (=｀ω´=) : Shouyou? Are you alright? Please talk to me. 

 

Suga-san  (◕ᴗ◕✿): Hinata-kun, I’m always here to talk if you need it. 

 

Iwaizumi-san :D: Just letting you know that coach is pissed you skipped practise.

 

Iwaizumi-san :D: Also, I’m outside your apartment.

* * *

 

 

Shouyou had about five seconds warning before Iwaizumi started thumping on the door. 

 

He burrowed himself further under the covers and hoped he’d go away.

 

“Shrimp, if you don’t open the door, I’m going to break it down!” Iwaizumi threatened. 

 

Shouyou winced, because he knew he wasn’t joking, and begins to work up the nerve to come out of his cocoon of blankets.

 

“Stop making so much noise!” someone yelled.

 

“How about you fuck off?!” Iwaizumi shouted back. 

 

Shouyou swings the door open and hurriedly brings him inside, the glass from the picture frame crunching under Iwaizumi’s boots. Iwaizumi takes a long look at him and his forehead crumples into a frown. 

 “Yo, Iwaizumi-san!” he chimes. He sounds normal, right?

“You look like shit.” Iwaizumi says bluntly, dumping a massive bag on the couch,  Shouyou can hear the concern in his voice, knows he would see it in his eyes if he met them. He forces himself to grin. “Haha, Iwaizumi-san, that’s pretty harsh!” he tries to laugh. It sounds weak to his own ears.

 It’d been three days since the…incident. He couldn’t bring himself to do anything but sob and hope Tobio’s name would flash on his phone screen. His mouth tastes like something died in it, and he probably smells like something dying too. “Look, Iwaizumi-san, if you came here to talk, we-“

“Shower first, talk after,” Iwaizumi says, and gives him a pointed look. 

“I don’t wa-“

Iwaizumi raises a single eyebrow and Shouyou quickly shuffles into the bathroom.

He catches sight of himself under the flickering fluorescent lights. Sallow skin, dark circles, unwashed hair. A scar on his chin from where he split it rollerskating with Natsu. Shouyou looks like you could snap him in two with the most gentle hands. _I wonder what he looks like_. Strong and tall, like Kageyama. Ocean eyes and ash blond hair like that film star he likes. _Or she_. Soft and curvy, with flawless skin and a soft voice. Shouyou’s vision begins to blur. Shaking his head hard, he gets in the shower and…stops.

 

Because Kageyama had left the shower head too high for him to reach. Kageyama had a habit of leaving the head attached where he showered- far out of Shouyou’s 165cm grasp. Shouyou begins giggling, first softly, then hysterically. This feels like a final fuck you, one more shot in a dead body. 

He’s sobbing now, stretching high on his tip-toes, and he can’t do it, he can’t reach, not without Tobio. He can’t, he can’t he can’thecanthecant _hecant._

 

“Shrimpy?” Iwaizumi says, and it feels like he’s been doused with cold water. Iwaizumi rips the shower curtain open and Shouyou squeals and covers himself (even though they’re on the same university volleyball team and have seen each other naked a million times- it’s a matter of principle!). Iwaizumi looks at him. He looks at the shower head. He looks back at Shouyou and he can almost see Iwaizumi’s heart _ache_ for him as he reaches for the damn thing and hands it to him. “Sit down,” Iwaizumi says, as he runs the water. Shouyou does just that, bringing his knees to his chest as the bath fills with warm water and bubbles pile high, something floral permeating the air. Iwaizumi tips his head back with gentle fingers and lathers his hair, and _shit_ , Shouyou hasn’t done this since he was a little kid. 

 

It feels very nice, being cared about. 

 

Iwaizumi forced him out of the bath before the water went cold (“You’ll get ill, idiot!” He sounds so much like Tobio that Shouyou almost starts crying again) and into clean clothes (“Shrimpy, you’re coming to the laundrette with me tomorrow. No arguments.”). He’s stirring something tomatoe-y in a big pot. Shouyou is huddled on the couch in a clean fluffy blanket (Iwaizumi’s bag is apparently bottomless), watching him work quietly, where he would normally be bouncing around and generally being a nuisance. It’s unnerving, Hajime thinks. Finally, Iwaizumi brings over two steaming bowls of noodles, and smiles when he sees his friend brighten a little. Shouyou’s slurping the last of the broth down when Iwaizumi looks at him with his it’s-time-to-have-a-serious-talk face on. 

 

“Shrimpy, y’know what I’m going to say, don’t you?” Iwaizumi finally says.

“Yeah, I-yeah.” Shouyou’s pathetic attempt at a reply gets him a pitying look.

“You’ve had your time to mope alone, Hinata. You should have come straight to me, or Tsukishima, or…anyone!”

“How’d you find out?” Hinata whispers, staring hard at his knees.

Iwaizumi swallows roughly and is privately glad Hinata isn’t looking at him. “He brought someone with him. To volleyball practise, today.”

Shouyou feels his stomach lurch.

“Moves pretty fucking quickly, doesn’t he?” Shouyou grits out, knuckles white, bunched up in the blanket

“Tsukishima almost punched him,” Iwaizumi says, and Shouyou grins a little. On coming to university, Shouyou and Tsukishima had suddenly…clicked. They still fought- Tsukishima’s the reason half the university call him ‘Shrimp’- but it was teasing now. Tsukishima Kei is one of his best friends, and if you’d told him that in high school Shouyou would have burst your eardrums with rants about how Tsukishima Kei is probably going to instigate the apocalypse. 

But Shouyou needs to know. “What do they look like? Do I know them?”

“Probably not. Some chick called Yuuko- plays tennis or something like that-“

“Tennis?!” and for some reason that’s absolutely _fucking hilarious_ to Shouyou, volleyball-mad Kageyama Tobio, no room in his head for anything else, dating a tennis player. As if he’s cheating on the sport and Shouyou .He half-laughs, half-cries into Iwaizumi’s chest until he falls asleep.

 

 

Shouyou wakes up in his bed, bleary-eyed. He fumbles for his alarm clock and feels a note stuck to it. 

 

 

_ Shrimpy, _

_  Eat breakfast, and GO TO CLASS. There’s a bento in the fridge. _

_  I’ll pick you up here at 3 for the laundry run.  _

_ Iwaizumi _

 

_ PS I asked Tsukishima to tell me if you don’t show up.  _

_ PPS I’ll kick your ass if you keep torturing yourself. _

_ PPPS Yachi-san will probably cry if she doesn’t see you today. _

 

 

Shouyou groans a little, pulling himself out of bed and getting ready for university. Iwaizumi-san’s like the big brother he never had. He’d been terrified of him at first, without Tanaka to hide behind, but was a devotee of the ‘Iwaizumi Hajime is Probably God’ club ever since he’d clapped him on the back with a “Nice kill!” their second week of practise, all sincerity and strength and arm muscles.

 

He slides into the lecture hall in the nick of time, sprinting to beat their professor. He flops in his seat between Tsukishima and Yachi. 

“Shouyou!” Hitoka says, sounding a little tearful “Are you o-“

Tsukishima backhands his head hard. “That’s for not picking up, dipshit.”

“OW! Meanie Kei!” Shouyou pouts, but leans into his side anyway. It’s a testament to the strength of their friendship that Tsukishima doesn’t recoil, and instead puts an arm around him and squeezes him tight. Yachi puts her head on Shouyou’s shoulder. The professor talks about heroes and villains and monsters in the background as Shouyou tries to explain, can’t, and just breathes “I love him so much,” over and over again in the most heartbroken voice they’ve ever heard. 

 

They refuse to leave Shouyou’s side until Iwaizumi picks him up to go on a laundry run, and even then Shouyou has to force them away. Yachi throws herself at him, hugging him fiercely before she goes. “I’ll call you tonight,” she whispers, and Tsukishima ruffles his hair. “You better pick up the phone,” he warns, smirk playing at his lips.

“Yeah, yeah,” Hinata says, purposely rolling his eyes. 

 

He’s still smiling when they stop outside another block of flats in Iwaizumi’s crappy Ford. “Hang on, I need to go get someone else,” Iwaizumi almost growls.

Shouyou is left alone in the car then, and he winces a little, thoughts turning back to Kageyama and his new tennis player girlfriend. Was she pretty? Hinata hadn’t even found a picture, Tsukishima had slapped his phone out his hand when he tried. Yuuko. Snow. Maybe she was pale and de-HOLY SHIT, that’s the Grand King.

Squinting, Shouyou can make out Iwaizumi holding two massive bags of laundry in one hand and dragging a pouting tall man with the other. “Iwa-chaannn! I don’t wan-“ Oikawa tries to protest as Iwaizumi all but throws him into the car, followed by the bags. He splutters and struggles like a child (Shouyou is reminded of Natsu’s “LET ME STAY AWAKE MOMMY!” tantrums) until he notices Hinata staring openly at him.

“Oh? Why’s Karasuno’s shorty here?” Oikawa chimes, leaning forward predatorily. Shouyou is suddenly reminded of Scar from the Lion King. “Shut up, you ass. You know damn well why he’s here,” Iwaizumi grouches, stamping hard on the accelerator. They take of with a screech, and now Shouyou is fearing for his life for two reasons. 

“I didn’t know you went to our university, Grand K-Oikawa-san,” he corrects quickly, flush crawling up his cheeks. 

“Iwa-chan goes wherever I go!” Oikawa sings.

“Shut up!”

Oikawa pulls a face in the mirror. Hinata giggles a little, and he looks vaguely pleased. 

“How come you don’t play volleyball with us?” 

Shouyou wishes he hadn’t asked, because tension fills the air faster than you can say “instant regret”. 

“Ah, Shrimpy-chan, don’t you know? I’ve hurt my knee!” Oikawa says lightly, but there’s something that feels a lot like broken glass in his steady gaze in the rearview mirror. 

 

* * *

 

You: Oikawa-san?

 

Oikawa-san: Who is this?

Oikawa-san: An admirer?

Oikawa-san: Makki if you’re pretending to be a handcrafted dildo salesman again I s2g >:( I'm not falling for that a third time!

 

You: ah, no, sorry. It’s Hinata Shouyou (Karavuno’s No 10)

You: I just wanted to say sorry for earlier

You: About the volleyball thing

You: So…sorry. 

 

Oikawa-san: Don’t worry, shrimpy-chan (◕ᴗ◕✿)

Oikawa-san: You can make it up to me by pulling a prank on IWA-CHAN!~

 

You: No thanks,I liek my face as it is!!!!!!! D:

 

Oikawa-san: Ah, I’ll protect you ;P

 

You: nojnG CAN DEFEND ANY1 FROM IWAIZUMI-SAN

You: not even GOD

You: tho Im pretty sur e he is god hahahahah

You: No 1's as KOOL as Iwaizumi san!!!1!!!

Oikawa-san: w h a t???????????????

 

 

Hinata falls asleep with a slight smile as his phone chimes with messages of outrage from one very bitter Seijoh captain. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> platonic hair washing is a thing
> 
> mother iwa
> 
>  
> 
> love u xxx


	3. don't make me sad, don't make me cry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo yo yo finally we have some oihina development up in this CHIZ  
> btw all the songs are by HRH lana del rey  
> my queen <33333333  
> thank u so much to everyone who's reading this fic, leaving comments and kudos and bookmarks, it makes my DAY  
> ps this chapter is dedicated to ashleeforreal bc they're funny, even if they didn't get to church on time  
> I hope u all enjoy xxx
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bag1gUxuU0g

 

Time: 17:32

Oikawa-san: what’s your opinion on lana del rey

Oikawa-san: I’m asking for science

 

You: never heard of it??  ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Oikawa-san: you heathen

_ Oikawa-san is typing... _

___________________________

 

Time: 13:12

 

Oikawa-san: did you listen to her album?

 

You: I did!!!! it was…different??

 

Oikawa-san: *fucking fantastic, Oikawa-sama, Lana del Rey is a goddess, yes, I’ll buy u merch

_ You are typing... _

____________________________

 

Time: 09:00

You: Did u and Iwaizumi-san just run past my apartment??  三三ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

 

Time: 9:34

Oikawa-san: IWA-CHAN WAS CHASING ME

Oikawa-san: HE CH A S E D E OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oikawa-san: MY OWN HOUSE!!!!!!

Oikawa-san: HE SAID THAT I’M USING MY KNEE AS N EXCUSE TO BE LAZY

 

_ You are typing... _

 ____________________________

 

Time: 14:14

You: How did your stats test go?

 

Oikawa-san: not as well as I hoped 

 

You: that doesn’t matter!!! you’re like the cleverest person EVER

You: except maybe Kenma

 

Oikawa-san: it’s not

Oikawa-san: I’m never going to get to NASA like this

 

You: Don’t be silly!!!! i’d take u to space bc ur ouT OF THIS WORLD!!!!!!!!

 

Oikawa-san: thanks, chibi-chan  (◕ ω ◕✿)  7/10 for the pun

 

_ You are typing... _

_________________________

 

Time: 18:49

 

You: where are we meeting?

 

Oikawa-san: outside Iwa-chan’s house. Do you have cake?

 

You: of course!  *･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿(◕ᴗ◕✿)✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･*

 

Oikawa-san: good bc I have the good stuff ;)

 

You: ahhhh I have to leave early bc practise  щ(`Д´щ;)

 

_ You are typing... _

______________________

 

Time: 03:02

 

Oikawa-san: Don’t you think it’s weird that we’re here, and we’re not sure why?

 

You: OIKAWA-SAN IT;S  THREE IN THE MORNIG

 

Oikawa-san: it’s strange though

Oikawa-san: because we could be here for a purpose and we’ll never know

Oikawa-san: someone you passed on the street could be your soulmate and you’d never know

Oikawa-san: someone you know could be your soulmate but u never looked at them that way so u’ll never know 

Oiwaka-san: also- why the fuck are dogs so fucking cute?

Oikawa-san: there’s just so much we don’t know

Oikawa-san: it pisses me off, chibi-chan

 

You: are you drunk?

 

Oikawa-san: maybe

 

You: are you still at Iwaizumi-san’s house?

You: should I come pick you up? are you okay?

 

Oikawa-san: no

 

_ You are typing…  _

 

Oikawa-san: I’m not sure I ever forgave you guys for beating us, you know

 

You: oh

_ Read at 03:18 _

_________________________

 

Shouyou worried at his lip as he walked to his halls that morning until he could feel a warm trickle of blood run onto his tongue. He couldn’t stop thinking about what Oikawa had said. Sure, he knew that it would be a sore topic. They were athletes after all. Hell, he heard Kunimi rejected a scholarship to their school because he knew that Shouyou, Kageyama and Tsukishima were going. They had stopped Aoba Jousai from going to Nationals for three years, Tobio with his fearsome sets, Tsukishima and his clever blocking, Yamaguchi and his terrifying serves, Shouyou and his jumps, his ace title.

Everybody thought that after the third years left Karasuno would be grounded once more, but they couldn’t be more wrong. They won once, twice more, and suddenly volleyball talent was flooding in from all corners of the prefecture. They had fans- Tsukishima had the most, for whatever mad reason, but a boy had once dropped his bag in a grocery store when he saw Hinata and had been dragged over by his little sister fifteen minutes later, blushing and sweating and stammering, to ask for an autograph.

Shouyou had never thought that the memory of that match wouldn’t sting- he remembers the feeling in his chest when the memory of his blocked spike played behind his eyelids in the dead of night and shivers a little.  A weighty pain, that feels like a bowling ball in your chest, heavy, heavy, heavy and it _hurts_. But he did think that Oikawa wouldn’t mention it- matches like that, emotions like that are sort of taboo in the community. You don’t goad if you win, you aren’t openly bitter if you lose. _Iwaizumi-san definitely doesn’t hold it against me_ , Shouyou thought. _I guess because Oikawa-san was captain?_

 They hadn’t seen much of each other at the party, except for a bit of awkward small talk at the very start. Conversation between them flowed over text, but in person was stilted, filled with awkward pauses and shifting on the spot. But this was the longest they’d gone without talking for the past four weeks. _  Maybe he's busy? Or is he mad? I haven’t done anything, though?! I know a lot of them aren't really keen on us as a whole... _

Seijoh were still strong, still their rivals. But Karasuno now flew a little higher than the doves did, and that bore an acrid hatred from the other boys. Hinata had made friends with their Mad-Dog who was, surprisingly, the most sporting about the fact that they’d beaten Seijoh the second time, even as the ace. 

“You won because you played better,” he had grunted, as they walked back from the cafe they’d met up in “hating you for that makes no sense. There’s a whole load of other reasons to hate you guys,” Shouyou had squawked indignantly and slapped his arm with a grin. 

Speaking of Kyoutani, he’d texted Shouyou the night before with a very explicit list of reasons why Tobio hadn’t been worthy of him. Shouyou laugh-cried through them all, before calling him to tell him about how well he’d done in practise that day.

Practise was still awkward (but thankfully girlfriend-free), not just between him and  Kageyama, but Kageyama and all of Shouyou’s friends. Even though Shouyou had told them not to start anything, he’s pretty sure that if Tsukishima glared any harder Kageyama would combust on the spot. His new senpai are protective too, a particularly affectionate boy named Daiki had taken to misguidedly but sweetly buying him rom-coms and shoujo manga. 

Of course, Shouyou didn’t read them. Any of them. And Tsukishima hadn’t caught him crying when the two main characters who couldn’t stop tiptoeing around each other finally pulled their heads out of their asses and confessed. It never happened. 

Kaegyama stopped coming to the team gatherings which Shouyou had always dragged him to, stopped talking to the rest of them outside of practise. Hell, he didn’t talk to half of them in practise, sticking with those who never really spoke to Shouyou, showering and leaving before the rest of them. He didn’t seem to do extra practise now, either. Not that Shouyou would help him. The top of Japan, and then the top of the world, was what they said. Together, always together.

 Shouyou hit Akaashi’s tosses now, which felt foreign at first, but he fell into more and more of a rhythm with him. Akaashi knew his spikers well, knew how to bring out the best in every one. His tosses were brilliant.

They weren’t quite the freak duo, though.

 

He tapped his fingers impatiently on the desk the whole lecture, much to Tsukishima’s chagrin. 

“Shouyou, I swear to god-“ 

His phone chose that moment to beep merrily at him, and Tsukishima’s glare was joined by sixteen others.

“Sorry!” he whispers, sliding it put of his pocket, heart jumping at the name on the screen.

______

 

Time: 12:43

 

Oikawa-san: Are you free, Shrimpy?

 

You: Will b in about half an hour? 

 

Oikawa-san: Let’s go for lunch. I’ll pick you up from your lecture hall. 

 

______

 

Shouyou squeaks a little. Yachi peeps over his shoulder, Tsukishima not-so-subtly craning his head so he can read his phone screen too. 

“Oh, so that’s who you’ve been thinking about,” Tsukishima says lecherously. 

“Stupid! Don’t say it like that!”

“Oh, Shou! I’m so happy for you!” Yachi positively beams, and Shouyou wouldn’t be surprised if he’s got a few extra freckles from the brightness of her grin. 

“We aren’t like that, Hitoka-chan,” he mutters, feeling heat crawling up his neck. 

“Okay, sure!” she sings. Shouyou just groans, because once Yachi Hitoka’s got an idea, she sticks to it like superglue. Sometimes Shouyou misses the blushing, stammering first-year with glittery hair clips.

“He didn’t even ask. He sure is forward, huh?” Tsukishima grins. 

“Definitely,” Yachi agrees, eyes twinkling “such a strong, _dominating_ -“

 Shouyou’s pretty sure you can see him glowing red from space.

__________

 

Time: 13:15

 

Oikawa-san: Will probably be about ten-fifteen mins, some doughnut’s parked his car behind mine  (ʘ‿ʘ✿)

You: Thats okay! no worries :D

_________

 He’s sitting on the bench outside the lecture hall, watching people stream away from all sides. Yachi and Tsukishima had left him with a wink and a few more jokes that made him almost overheat. He plays about on his phone for a while. A pretty girl comes over and looks at the bag sitting beside him pointedly until something clunks into place in his brain and he moves. 

“Sorry!” he says with an embarrassed grin.

“No worries, Hinata-kun!” she smiles back, plopping herself down beside him, tennis bag at her feet. 

Tennis bag.

Hinata-kun.

_ Fuck. _

“I’m Suzuki Yuuko. Tobio’s girlfriend,” she says, and Shouyou takes a good look at her. She’s tall, milk-pale, with dark hair and intelligent eyes. The exact opposite of Shouyou, in other words.

“Right,” he says, for lack of anything else. In his head he’s screaming for someone, anyone to come and rescue him from this absolutely fucking horrendous situation, for a car to veer off the road and smash him against the wall. 

“I though, seeing as I’m his girlfriend, you’re his best friend, we ought to get to know each other,” Suzuki trills. Shouyou feels his jaw drop a little. 

“Best frie-“

“Yeah! Seeing as you guys spend so much time together and stu- well you haven’t since Tobio moved in, but that’s to be expected of c-”

“Wait,” Shouyou says. His heart is beating bruisingly hard against his chest as his brain scurries to process everything he’s been told. “He said we were friends? Just friends?”

“Well, yeah,” Suzuki says, tone a little more gentle, patronising  “he said you messed about a little. Experimented,” 

_ Experimented. _

He meets her eyes, and there’s a distinct flame of challenge simmering behind the warm brown of her irises.

He doesn’t know what to do. 

‘Experimented' loops around his mind, thrums through his veins. He can taste it bitter on his tongue, feel it in the shake of his hands.

“Well, doesn’t this look cozy?” 

Shouyou almost weeps with relief when he hears that familiar melodic voice. A large, warm hand squeezes his shoulder tight.

“Hina-chan, we should be going. Sorry I’m late,” Oikawa says, picking up Shouyou’s bag.

“Bye-bye, Hinata-kun!” Suzuki smiles. Hinata just nods. 

Oikawa hurries him towards the car. He doesn’t say anything, but his hand stays warm on Shouyou’s shoulder.

_________________

 

Shouyou takes a deep, shuddering breath when he slams the door of the passenger seat. Oikawa slides in next to him. 

There is silence, for a moment. 

“You okay, Chibi-chan?” Oikawa asks softly.

“Yep! Yeah, I’m okay, just-“ he chokes on a sob “I just-“

He feels tears drip steadily onto his hand. “I just- sorry. I don’t feel up to lunch today, can we- can we do something else?” 

“I know just the place,” Oikawa grins, and pulls out of campus. He thumps on the radio a few times before it starts playing quietly, a song that’s familiar to him by now.

 

_ I feel so [alone](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bag1gUxuU0g) on a Friday night, _

_ Can you make me feel like home, if I tell you you're mine? _

 

“Can we not…listen to something a bit happier?” Shouyou sniffs.

“Nope!” Oikawa says brightly, swerving dangerously and slamming his foot on the accelerator. 

“What? Why?!” he half-yells. Oikawa just smiles again in response, and Hinata can see the full sweep of his lashes in the sunlight, every freckle, every line. 

“Because you aren’t cried out yet. So cry really hard, until you can’t possibly cry anymore, and then we’ll go to the place,”

“But-“

“But nothing, Chibi-chan. We’ve tried Iwa-chan’s approach, and you’re now a functional human being. Now it’s the amazing love doctor Oikawa-sama who will help you heal!”

 

_ Don't make me sad, don't make me cry _

_ Sometimes love is not enough and the road gets tough, I don't know why _

 

“What-what? I don’t want-“

“You don’t have a choice!” 

“This is a kidnapping!” Hinata screeches at the top of his lungs.

“I’m too cute to be a criminal,” Oikawa sings, and the car lurches as if in agreement. Hinata clings to the sides of his seat. He never thought anyone could be a worse driver than Iwaizumi. He was very, very wrong.

 

“So, Chibi-chan. What attracted you to Tobio-chan in the first place, hmm?”

 

_ Come take a walk on the wild side, _

_ Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain, _

_ You like your girls insane, _

_ Choose your last words, this is the last time, _

_ Cause you and I, we were born to die. _

_  (we were born to die) _

 

“Do we have to talk about this?”

“Well, we don’t have to. But don’t you think you’ll feel better if you get it all out? You’ve been holding back with Glasses and that manager because you were all friends, and Iwa-chan because you didn’t want Tobio to lose any more face with a teammate, hmm?”

“I _haven’t_ been holding back!” Hinata says, indignant, but is that true? Could he have been protecting Tobio, unconsciously? Yachi had always been fond of both of them, tutoring them late into the night. He hadn’t wanted to completely ruin her image of Tobio. And he didn’t want to mess up the team’s dynamics even more, so maybe he held back a little with Iwaizumi-san. Tsukishima knew absolutely fucking _everything_ without saying anything anyway so he doesn’t count. 

 

“Ah, the look of revelation on your face is adorable, Chibi-chan! So tell me, someone who doesn’t like Tobio-chan at all, why you fell in love with him.”

 

“I- he was just so…everything.”

 

____________________________

 

“And one time he brought me new kneepads because he thought the old ones weren’t doing a good enough job, and it was so sweet, and…and…” he chokes again, and Oikawa slides him a can of something lemony from the glove compartment as he bawls.

 

_ Diet mountain dew, [baby](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k2iNfbnr1hA), New York City, _

_ Never was there ever a girl so pretty, _

_ Do you think we’ll be in love forever? _

_ Do you think we’ll be in love? _

_______________________________

 

“We used to call each other really late at night because we couldn’t wait to see each other at practise the next day and we used to fall asleep on the phone-“ he’s not crying anymore, but his body’s trying to, shuddering and shaking. His eyes burn, his lungs burn, his throat burns. 

 

_ I think I'll [miss you forever](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nVjsGKrE6E8), _

_ Like the stars miss the sun in the morning skies, _

_ Late is better than never, _

_ Even if you're gone I'm gonna drive, drive... _

_________________________________

 

“We said we would go to the top of the world together, the freak duo,” he sniffs “how am I supposed to do it now, when all I’ve ever planned had ‘with Tobio’ attached to the end?"

Oikawa just hands him a fresh packet of tissues.

 

_ Tell me life is [beautiful](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7FG3uWvFjJs), _

_ They think that I have it all, _

_ Nothing without you, _

_ All my dreams and all the lights mean, _

_ Nothing if I can't have you. _

____________________________

 

“When we got here he was confessed to literally 7 times within the first two days. And he said he didn’t want any of them, because he had us, in that grumpy way of his,” Shouyou laughs, a tiny, hollow sound. Oikawa had had to stop for petrol, and refused to let Shouyou pay a penny. He returned with two cups of coffee and grilled sandwiches, and made Shouyou eat as he talked.

 

"Maybe ‘us' meant me and Suzuki though, on second thought,” Shouyou says quietly, stomach dropping a little “I’m not sure when they started…being a thing,” 

 

“I could find out for you, if it would help you get over him, Chibi-chan,” Oikawa offers, flicking the headlights on. Shouyou shrugs and then stops. It’s dark now, Shouyou suddenly realises. He checks the time on his phone: 22:14?!

 

“Oh my god, it’s so late! I’m so sorry, I’ve kept you-“

“No, Chibi-chan,” Oikawa says firmly “we aren’t done yet. Talk about his new girl. What was she saying to you?”

“Oh. Um. She was saying stuff like ‘Tobio told me you guys experimented’ and shit like that, and that ‘seeing as you’re his best friend and I’m his girlfriend we should be best friends’ or something like that,”

“Experimented?” Oikawa growled, and Shouyou is soothed by Oikawa’s anger on his behalf, but there’s something niggling at him in his chest that he just needs to spit out. 

“Anyway,” Shouyou said quickly, before he lost his nerve “I can see why Kageyama would choose her. She’s really pretty and tall and seems clever and sporty and-“

 The car jerks to a stop. The road’s empty behind them, Shouyou notices with relief, before Oikawa grabs both of his hands in his large ones. 

 

_ The boys, the girls, _

_ They all like [Carmen](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6K8Uq88BEQ), _

_ She gives them butterflies, _

_ Bats her cartoon eyes- _

Oikawa smacks the radio off.

“Chibi-chan. Suzuki-what-the-fuck-ever her name is no concern of yours, alright? You aren’t worth less than her,” Oikawa says in a low voice, caramel eyes boring into amber. 

Shouyou stays silent.

“She isn’t prettier than you, she isn’t funnier than you, she- well, she’s probably smarter than you,” he carries on, and Shouyou sticks his tongue out at him “so…don’t think you’re worse than her. Toby’s just a fucking idiot, who doesn’t know a go-he’s an idiot.” Oikawa finishes awkwardly. 

 

Shouyou smiles brighter than he thinks he ever has, swollen eyes crinkling.

 

____________________

 

“So where are we going?” Shouyou says, rubbing at his raw nose. 

“All cried out?” Oikawa replies teasingly.

“Yes!”

“Okay, so we’re going to~ my house!”

“Heh?” 

“My house, to watch all the Star Trek movies,”

“Aren’t there like…fifteen?”

“Are you saying you can’t do it? Weakling,"

"I prefer Star Wars, actually!”

“Get _out_ of my car.” Oikawa wails dramatically.

 

____________________

 

They get half way through the second movie before Oikawa falls asleep. They're curled up on the soft couch in a blanket- Shouyou recognises it as one of Iwaizumi's. Shouyou carefully takes Oikawa's glasses off and puts them on the coffee table. He seems so much younger when he’s asleep, forehead smooth, face lax. 

He’s not sure how Oikawa managed to make him say all of that in the car, but he’s glad he did. Something in him feels lighter, freer, his lungs can finally expand all the way.

For the second time that day, something clunks into place in his brain.

_ Oikawa thinks I’m pretty? _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry I made suzuki quite catty by mistake but all will be clear~~~~~~~~~  
> have a lovely day!! xxx  
> ps if u have any fic requests/prompts for pretty much any hinata pairing (except with ukai and takeda bc for me that is a noooo) let me know :DDD


	4. is it by mistake or design (chapter 3.5)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im just.....so sorry?????? im so busy and my anxiety has been like GWAAAHHH lately and my mum hates me atm and im v sad  
> so yeah  
> i'm sorry this is so bad compared to the others  
> but i hope u kind of like it anyway xxx  
> genuinely, everyone who comments makes me want to CRY because u guys are so nice

Shouyou jerks awake as his phone begins bawling in his ear, scrambling to shut it up. He squints a little, before realising that he is no longer in the living room, but lying on a shitty university mattress. Oikawa lies sprawled on the floor by his feet, dawn light painting his features gold. Shouyou stares, just a little. 

He gathers his things as quietly as he can, slipping out the door feeling happier than he has in a long time. 

 

 

Time: 08:32

 

You: Thank you so much for yesterday!!!! ill pay u back somehow :D 

 

Shouyou stared at the message. It didn’t feel like enough, somehow. Should he put a kiss? Maybe he should? They’ve known each other a while now and- but what if Oikawa thinks that’s weird? He types and deletes, types and deletes. It’s fine! _No, it’s not_. But it should be! _Well, it’s not_. I’m gonna do it! _bu_ -no buts!

 

Time: 08:41

 

You: Thank you so much for yesterday!!!! ill pay u back somehow :D xxx

 

_Why did he do that?_ One would have been okay, maybe, but three? He did it reflexively, he always sent three kisses to Yachi-san (and Tsukishima, just to piss him off) but to someone he doesn’t know that well? Oh god. This was like the fifth grade all over again. Now Oikawa’s never going to text him again, he’ll think he’s a creepy stalker an-

\----------------

 

** The Three Musketeeerrrrrrrssss!!!!!!!!!!!!! <333333333333 **

Thurs 21 Mar 17

Hitoka-chan!! ＼（＾０＾）ノ<3: stick it up ur butt kei

 

Now:

You: [screenshot]

You: AAAAAAAAAAAAA WHATHAVE I DONE??!!!!

Hitoka-chan!! ＼（＾０＾）ノ<3: AAAAAAAAAAAA

You: I’m so ebrassed

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: the only embarrassing thing is your spelling

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: chill, Shouyou

You: hnnnnngggggggggggggggg i’m so DONE 

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: He literally let you stay at his house? Why are you panicking about sending him three kisses? You might be three foot tall, but you aren’t three years old

You: i HATE u kei why are u always right

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: lol it’s genetic

You: thanks for the advice sweet cheeks xxxxxxxxxxx

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: I’ll fucking deck you next time I see you

You: I could dodge your noodly arms with my eyes closed!! ;D

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: i’m going to throw you into the swimming pool

You: love you keikei <3

Stupidshima BASTARD >:P: smh

 

__________________

Time: 08:57

 

Oikawa-san: No problem, chibi xxx

 

_______________________

Oh.

 

Shouyou plays the best he thinks he ever has in practise. He’s not sure why, considering that Oikawa never actually _said_ he was pretty, he just kind of…implied it? And it’s not like he has a crush on Oikawa or anything. Maybe it’s because Oikawa is very pretty himself? Shouyou isn’t sure. That doesn’t stop the dizzying lightness in his chest, stop him from almost floating away whenever he leaps from the ground, like a hot air balloon with no sandbags. Those words, those three little 'x's elevate him. Shouyou soars.

 

______________________

 

“Why are you so excited?” Daiki pants bemusedly a week later, looking at Shouyou leaping energetically around the locker room after three hours of gruelling practise. Their coach was in a  particularly bad mood- something about idiot teenagers ruining his garden- and had made them do drill after drill until Hinata swore he could feel each individual muscle fibre protesting.The rest of the team is struggling to bend to tie their shoes. One of the upperclassmen is lying on the floor, people stepping over him as he groans.

“Nothing!” Hinata grins, getting dressed in record time. He’s about to leap onto Iwaizumi to plead for food after practise, but the captain taps him on the shoulder. “Come talk to me for a minute,” he says, before gesturing at the gym. Hinata crinkles his brow but follows, shutting the door loudly behind him (“Hinata, I swear to god!” Iwaizumi yells. Shouyou decides to not ask him for ice cream). He’s laughing a little, but stops short at the look on his captain’s face. He seems…sorry.

“Look, Hinata. You’re a really good volleyball player. But I’m afraid-“

No.

_ No. _

This can’t be happening. Why was this happening? He knew he didn’t play very well for a while after the breakup, but he really thought he’d been doing well lately! He hadn’t seen this coming- _j_ _ust like Yuuko. You never saw her coming either._

“Please don’t kick me off the team!” Hinata shrieks, sinking into a bow so low he’s almost bent double. Tears spring up in his eyes. How was he supposed to  _function_ without volleyball? 

“No, no Hinata, it’s nothing like that!” His captain says, waving his hands frantically. Shouyou practically melts with relief.

“Oh, thank god!” Hinata puffs, rubbing at his eyes. 

“It’s just…look, Hinata. You’re an incredible volleyball player. We can all see it. I wouldn’t be surprised if I visit after graduation in two years and you’re ace-“

“Thank you so much! I’ll keep working hard!” Hinata beams.

“But-y our quicks with Kageyama are why we worked so hard to get you guys to come here. They’re an important weapon for the upcoming tournament. Please don’t misunderstand me, you are incredible with anybody setting to you, but with Kageyama you’re…extraordinary- as is he, with you. Nobody can keep up with him like you can. Coach told me to-he told me to make you guys practise together again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope u liked it xxx

**Author's Note:**

> hope u enjoyed xxx have a gr9 day


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